"Tuesday, June 13, 2006
6/10 Changed Everything
Run for your lives - America is under attack! Just days ago three prisoners at Guantanamo Bay committed suicide in a savage assault on America's freedom to not care about prisoner suicides! Oh sure, the 'Blame Atrocities First' crowd will tell you these prisoners were 'driven to despair,' that they 'had no rights,' that they were 'held and tortured without due process or judicial oversight in a nightmarish mockery of justice.' But what they won't tell you is that they only committed suicide as part of a diabolical ruse to trick the world into thinking our secret torture camp is the kind of secret torture camp that drives its prisoners to commit suicide! This fiendish attempt to slander the great American institution of the gulag is nothing less than an act of asymmetrical warfare against the United States - a noose is just a suicide bomb with a very small blast radius, people! - and when faced with a terrorist attack, America must respond. Giblets demands immediate retaliatory airstrikes on depressed Muslim torture victims throughout the mideast!"
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
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